If you are one of the people who tend to hold on to what has hurt you, and keep out anyone or anything that would help you move on, you are keeping the "Bad" in and the "Good" out.
Here is an example: a small girl in the group home would never let anyone help her with her hair. She said, "My mother always did my hair - and no one else!" So, she kept the picture of her mother combing her hair in her Quality World - but it meant that no one did her hair. She wanted the feeling she got when her mother did her hair - but she rejected anyone who might help her. Since her mother was completely out of the picture, how long should the little girl suffer?
An Exercise we do with the girls is as follows:
1. We start with a picture of a fence. We ask the girls to write around the top of the fenced area all the "Bad" they hold in (example: No one loves me and no one ever will)
2. Then we ask them to write the "Good" they keep out behind the gate (example: There are people I can choose to trust)
3. Finally, they write on the gate posts the boundaries that will help them fill their Quality World pictures. (I can find people who will care about me and will be safe for me to be with.