Working with disturbed children can warp your mind! For example, if you give one child a gift card for hard work at school, another child acts like you took something away from her.
If you make a meal one child requested, another child acts like you took away a request from her.
As I listen to the staff complain about this, I am drawn to the 5 Needs.
If we teach the 5 Needs and constantly use them we will help the children understand that Love and Belonging is a need we all have, not a math problem where someone always comes up with a deficit.
To fill a need we teach the children to communicate their need, and make a plan to satisfy it. No mystery, no math! Recognize the need and make a plan to fill it.